We underestimate God so much. So so much. We pray little prayers because we imagine a little god who has small plans for us. So we set aside our big dreams and pray little easy prayers. Instead of praying brave prayers for healing and asking God to do the impossible, we pray that we may accept all circumstances and live honorably with how life rolls. Yes, when we realize that our dreamy plans don't match up with God's will, which happens from time to time, submission and trust come into play. Sometimes though, we need to challenge the easy flow of life. If things aren't getting hard and it's all just enough for us to feel okay with our lives, aren't we missing out on so much? If we don't take the big risks and ask God to see us through, how will we know that's not what we are supposed to do? When we say "everything just fell together so perfectly" for a circumstance or decision that had to be made, doesn't that make it sound too easy. Maybe that was good, but what if something so much better could've come about if we had passed up the ideal opportunity and smashed down the doors to impossible opportunities. When we wait for everything to line up oh so nicely, 1. we'll be waiting for a long time, 2. we'll have only a few good experiences. Why am I waiting for doors to open for me when I should be knocking them down? Yes, God opens doors and lines things up to show us stuff sometimes, but that is not always the case. I've been acting like that's just how my life will be-- I will wait for Him to open a door and then I will start on that path, but if I meet any sort of push against me, I'm out-- because obviously that wasn't really God's plan.. because, you know, He would've made it a walk in the park if it had been.
What if I've got it all wrong? What if He gives us a break every once in a while and proves Himself, but what if maybe He shouldn't have to prove Himself? What if I should be living to prove Him? What if I should really live the belief that He is Almighty and that He is God of this Universe? What if I started living like He was bigger than all of this? What if I am supposed to be dreaming bigger and risking more? What if we should all be pulling a Noah every day? And what if God doesn't nudge us to make every move? What if we trust the hearts that He has been molding and follow those dreams? What if, maybe, just maybe, He does know what's up.. especially when we don't? And, what if we stop taking cautious baby steps but start running full speed to live, not just survive?
"Wait upon the Lord. Wait patiently." This is all over the Scriptures, said many times in many ways. And I waited for Him, and he provided. He was faithful, and now I have a job. But sometimes we wait when we should be up and going. Whenever we feel like there may be anything keeping us from following something, we back out, as if we were wrong in the first place. If we are living as Christ did and striving to be the salt of the earth, you can bet there will be so many things pushing against us. When our plans have great implications in the long run than we cannot yet imagine, and they are moved by the Spirit, everything around us will try to stop us. And so we take the easier good route and play it safe. We can count on enough things in life, we can secure future plans, but we still sacrifice enough to feel okay about the way we live. Well maybe we do us all some good to, at least on day in our lives, not know where our next meal is coming from. I can't say that this is the best for everyone. Maybe it is just what would do it for me. I think I need to live with more uncertainty, because at least that would me that I am taking risks and praying big prayers. Maybe if I stop waiting for clarity in future prayer and start trusting past promises then I will experience that big God that I say I believe in.
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